Hey guys,
Sorry I haven't written in a while, I've been busy, (not really, just lazy, but we can pretend can't we?) Anyways, so a couple of months ago, in my Writer's Craft class, I had to do an assignment that required that we were to write a satirical essay about technology and why it's destroying our lives or something. Let me tell you, that week I had more than enough material as my laptop broke down, my iPod was being weird and I did not have any internet or phones for a week. Needless to say, I did not have much of a social life that week either. At first, I was quite nervous to hand this in, as my friend wrote more of an essay type thing, (really funny, but her's had more of a train of thought and sounded all intelligent and stuff, whilst mine, well, let's just say its like an episode of The Perfect Storm, you take a bunch of everything that shouldn't mix, ever, mix it up and you get a bunch of everything that should never be mixed together, mixed together, which may or may not cause trouble. < I don't understand what I just wrote either. Do you see what I mean by jumping off track an-THE FLINTSTONES ARE ON?!?!
Here's the final result...
Facebook: The-Not-So-Nice Electric Friendship Generator
CU L8R @ DNR PCM K?
What the hell does that say you might ask? Apparently that garbled mess means ‘See You Later at Dinner Please Call Me Okay?’ Yeah, when I first saw it, I thought I was reading the subtitles to AVATAR. What has our intelligence come to? We live in a society where we spend more days learning English than we do math; and yet most Fifth graders know how to do 11th grade algebra but cannot spell ‘spelling’. What has happened to us you may ask? We’ve gone stupid, that’s what. We’ve become so reliant upon the internet, Facebook and texting that we no longer feel the need to actually work. We have the attention span of a gnat for pete’s sake!
Okay, maybe this will help; think back to the days when our parents were riding about on dinosaurs and when we knew what an 8 track tape was. Yeah, that far back. Back when typewriters were cutting edge technology and the gramophone was practically a concert in the house. Those were the days when if something was jammed, it was just the typewriter keys. What has happened since then you may ask? A lot. A lot of nothing. We may have come up with a cell-phone and Facebook (or the electric friendship generator as I call it), but we are a far cry from an advanced and intelligent society. Why? I’ll tell you why gosh darnit, because we live in a society where if we can’t load a text in less than three seconds we rant and we rave until we receive a new phone. We’re like a whiny five year old.
We used to have patience and morals but now, due to 4G networks and Facebook, we seem to have lost all hope in ever becoming intelligent and caring. Here’s a prime example: A couple of months ago, I read about this young man who was not openly gay and in a matter of weeks due to bullying, he was dead. His roommate and supposed ‘friend’ began taping his amorous activities and posting them on Facebook. This is exactly what I’m talking about people! The roommate was certainly not intelligent nor caring when he was posting this. He caused this nice young man’s death! People used to learn morals and values back in the days of actually writing letters. They learned something that very few people learn about today, patience. That’s right, patience. Read it slowly, think it over; let it settle into your mind before you continue reading, cause it’s going to be coming up a heck of a lot.
I was watching Dr Phil a while ago, and they interviewed this woman who had become so obsessed with the game Farmville that she was not feeding or taking care of her kids! They asked her how she managed to make it through the day of the interview and she said that she had a bunch of food lined up for the animals to survive. She paid more attention to virtual animals that you cannot even get a decent steak out of rather than her REAL kids! There is so much wrong with that scenario that I cannot even begin to explain.
Youtube. Now there’s a place where I can waste time. Forget casinos, Chuck E. Cheese (practically the same thing except for kids), or Facebook; YouTube is where I lose eye-sight, brain cells and precious hours all at the same time! It’s the new and improved YouTube kids, eye cancer treatment not included! I found a comedian (on YouTube, how shocking!) that has a little snippet that goes like this...
“I love YouTube, maybe you’re watching this on YouTube. It’s great isn’t it? I get these e-mails from my friends that say, “Hey check out this video, it made me think of you!” and you check it out and you’re like, “Yeah, that is pretty funny.” Then YouTube’s like, “Did you like this video? Why don’t you check this video?” And you’re like, “Well thank you YouTube, I did like that video.” And you click the next one and the next one and the next one and then oh my God, it’s Tuesday, how did this happen?! - Pete Zedlacher
Story of my life right there. I have lost so many precious and dear to me hours due to the wonderful land of YouTube. In fact, a number of moments ago, I lost a good half an hour due to some epic music videos that were being displayed on the home page of YouTube.
What was I talking about?
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Hope you enjoyed it, when I wrote how I lost a good half an hour to YouTube, I actually meant two hours, but I didn't want to look like an addict. I guess that's all out now. :P
